They say that things change a lot for a father once they have a daughter, because they adopt the mentality of having daddy's girl - which means to pamper incessantly! I'm not too sure about that but perhaps your mummy will testify to that, that there is a difference in how I handle your older brothers, and how I handle you. But I would like to think that I'm unbiased and love all my kids the same and treat them the way they ought to. But I must admit I was really curious how you'd turn out when you were born. Even though I've looked after your two older brothers, I was actually feeling a little more unsure because I didn't know how to clean a little baby girl up, and many people were telling me that girls are more fussy than boys. I've learnt how to do the former, and it doesn't appear any different to me for the latter.
You are clearly very much different from all the Yan offspring that have come before you. First of all, you're the first girl in the Yan family. All the boys in your generation have the Chinese word '至' (zhi4) in the middle of their Chinese name, beginning with your older cousin Raphael. We kept with the same sound for your middle name, but your mummy felt that '至' was too harsh sounding, so it has been tweaked to '芷' (zhi3), which means 'rooted'. The last part of your name is '忻' (xin1), meaning 'joyful', which is what your mummy wants you to be, but it also means 'inspire', which is what I want you to be. I want you, and all of my children, to be useful people to those around them. Raphael's name is 至恩 (en1) - meaning 'towards grace'; Nathan's name is 至仁 (ren2) - 'towards benevolence'; and Daniel's name is 至慷 (kang1) - 'towards magnanimity'. Thus, your full name is 严芷忻, Yan Zhixin, Elizabeth. You are to be stay rooted and humble, and to be a source of joy and inspiration to those around you. Your joy cannot be at the expense of others. Your brothers' names are all prophets from the Old Testament, and they all have six letters in them. For you, we have picked one from the New Testament, and she isn't a prophet, and her name is more than six letters long. Mummy thinks you'll have a tough time writing it out when you have to submit homework or exam papers, but we decided that the name was worth the effort. Elizabeth is the mother of St John the Baptist, and she is the cousin of Mary, the mother of Jesus. Her name means 'God's promise'. And may your name be a reminder of your greater purpose - to bring about God's promise to those around you.
And so, you were quite different from your brothers too in that you stayed in mummy's tummy all the way till term, and had to be induced to come out at week 40. It was all very controlled. First of all, mummy had to clear her Paediatric exam just a few weeks before, and there was a chance that you might have come out earlier, so close to term her exams were, and it was quite anxiety-inducing for her. But thankfully you were a good girl and stayed there, a bit too comfortably in the end. We did manage to have a proper night's rest as a result of this induction (both your brothers came out in the wee hours of the morning after a labourious night), and we only came to the hospital at 8 in the morning. The contractions came not too long after the induction, which was just around 10, and you came out in record time. The Obstetrician came to check in just after lunch, and found that your mummy was dilated at only up to about 4 cm, and went off for a meeting. And even before 4 hours was up (which was when the next check was due), your mummy felt something coming out and lo and behold, you had squirm your way out of mummy's tummy without having mummy even to push much. We had to wait for a good 15-20 minutes before the Obstetrician rushed back from her clinic just so that she could clamp the cord and aid with the 'delivery'. And so, there you were, born on 8th December 2022, at 1542 hr. You were our delightful baby number three!
You are also born in the year of the Tiger, and one of the puns I've come up with is that you're a 'Ti-girl'. But funny things aside, the men in our family are all of timid creatures - Nathan is born in the year of the Chicken, and Daniel and papa are born in the year of the Rat. Mummy is born in the year of the Dragon, and you are a Tiger. We are definitely going to be eaten alive.
Mummy also wants to remind you that you were born on the 'Feast of the Immaculate Conception', which is a special day on the Catholic calendar. The one who was immaculately concepted was Mary, the mother of Jesus, and not Jesus, just in case you are confused like your mummy. Some theology for you - Mary needed to be born sinless so that she could be the mother of God, and hence she herself was immaculately concepted - meaning born without sin.
The first sight of our daughter
Born at 1542 hr on 8th December 2022
Your birthweight was 2.562 kg.
This birthweight of yours was a bit of a shocker because your intra-partum weight was estimated to be 2.9 kg at term. This also triggered a battery of tests to determine why you had 'low birth weight' - a medical term. The cut-off is 2.6 kg, which you were nearly there. I wish you had that few more grams on you because one of the tests performed was a CMV (cytomegalovirus) screen, a virus that can cause babies to be born with a low birth weight, and also cause a lot of other troubles in growth and development. Now, there is something to know about your daddy and mummy - we are both doctors. Your mummy is a Paediatrician, and your daddy is an Infectious Diseases physician, and congenital CMV, which is what you were diagnosed with, unfortunately fell into both our territories, more so mine than mummy's.
Usually your mummy is most on the ball with health matters for kids, because of her background. For you, I was immediately on the front foot, reading up the literature and speaking to my bosses to sought their opinion. They also kindly contacted the Paediatric ID physicians, and Prof Chong Chia Yin came to see you at our behest. A whole additional battery of tests were performed, including a hearing screen, a cranial ultrasound and an eye screen, the latter of which was really quite a pain to watch you undergo. CMV can cause deafness, microcephaly and retinitis, and hence the above screen. This would have been used to decide whether to initiate treatment for you, although I was already quite keen to start regardless, because I was just fearful of the ramifications should these appear down the road and we were out of the therapeutic window - treatment was only indicated within 3-6 months of birth. Even till now, I still fret that anything can happen and I might regret that we didn't start treatment for you. The treatment, ganciclovir, has its own problems, and it could potentially be problematic if any adverse effects occurred. Hence, the decision made by the your Paediatric ID doctor was to monitor instead, and not treat. Thankfully, you've remained otherwise well so far in this first year of life, and hopefully will continue to be healthy.
Your first cries
Like for all your brothers, I was very particular that you scored full marks for your APGAR score, which you did.
One of the things people like to do is wonder who you look like - whether you look like papa or mummy, or like Nathan or Daniel. Most conclude that you look like Nathan (and therefore like papa), though some think you look like Daniel. Well, you definitely are a smiley baby, just like Daniel, but when I first heard your cries and screams, it was reminisce of Nathan. You are definitely a screamer.
Our first photo with our daughter
With the doctor who delivered you, Dr Manisha (who also delivered Daniel, but not Nathan)
With 爷爷 and 奶奶
They too have been waiting for a female Yan in the family for the longest time!
With 姨姨
Unfortunately, you had to go for your scans and 公公
and 婆婆 didn't have the opportunity to take a photo with you
We brought you home two days after your birth, to the excitement of your two older brothers! This was also the first time your mummy resided at our own place during her maternity leave, instead of at Dunbar Walk, which is your 公公's house. It didn't take too much getting used to, and was preferably more comfortable for everyone as well. Mummy could train you to sleep as she pleased (which means trying to get you to sleep on your own, instead of the rocking and bouncing that would otherwise have happened elsewhere).
Your kor kor Nathan and Daniel first laying eyes and hands on you
With uncle Ben, aunty Lynette and kor kor Raphael
All cosy and wrapped up
You developed quite bad facial eczema when you were a few weeks old but thankfully that's cleared up
What has begun with your kor kor Nathan and followed on by Daniel has now continued on to you - we scheduled to have a family photo shoot by aunty Alex, who is one of our church friends and a baby photographer. She was really professional and the photos turned out really beautiful!
Front facing shot - one pose that all of you have
All wrapped up
Sleeping peacefully
(Although you weren't quite so peaceful throughout the photoshoot)
Screaming your head off at your noisy brothers
At peace finally
With mama
With papa
The Yan siblings
Here are a few photos of you with the important people in your life! I hope you'll treasure them when you get to read through these letters that I leave for you.
With 大外婆 [papa's 婆婆]
We made a trip up to Kluang specially to visit her. She's quite elderly and unfortunately she passed away a day before your 1st birthday, but I'm glad you both managed to meet each other!
Celebrating Chinese New Year with 爷爷 and 奶奶, and your siblings and cousin
With the Ting family, including uncle Sam who is working in UK most of the year!
With grand uncle and aunty Ong
They looked after your papa when he was just a few days old, and are my godparents (one of many)
With grand uncle Francis and grand aunty Teresa
Aunty Mindy and jie jie Morgan flew over from UK and visited you when you were just a few days old
Celebrating 100 days of you together with a housewarming party as well for the Gian family.
You'll slowly get to know them as you slowly grow up
Celebrating your 姨姨 and uncle Ian's wedding
Here are some of the major events that happened throughout the year for you! First and foremost, you were baptised on 27th August 2023. It took a while for us to find a godmother for you, but we are really thankful for the one chosen by the Holy Spirit for you! In another way that makes you unique amongst your siblings, your brothers had godparents from within the family, but yours is the first one that isn't! She is aunty Genevieve who is also from our church community. We hope that you both can lead each other closer to Christ.
Smiling on the day of your baptism
Crying at the baptismal font!
With godma Genevieve
She had fractured her foot about two weeks before and had to come in crutches! She was really dedicated and we're very blessed to have her.
Just about a week before 姨姨's wedding, your kor kor Nathan fell ill with COVID-19 and the contagion spread throughout the family. Daniel got it next, and then you, all within 2 days of each other. Thankfully you all recovered fast and well, all in time to make it for the wedding. But papa fell ill the following week, after having to manage the three of you!
Clinging to papa when you were down with a raging COVID-19 fever
We had plans to go on a holiday to Batam in April, and just the day before we were suppose to take a ferry, you fell ill with a fever! But it was just a single spike and you were not ill after that. So we delayed our trip by a day and made the ferry crossing the following day. What was meant to be a 3-day-2-night stay became a 2-day-1-night stay. It was a bit rushed, but it was your first trip out of the country. I don't think you'll remember anything at all, and in fact, you had a terrible night there, waking up in the middle of the night, inconsolable. It took quite a humongous effort to calm you down, and we were far from rested at the end of the trip! But at least we made it.
At the Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal
Lying on our huge bed in our accommodation
Along the jetty at Montigo Nongsa Resort
We made it across the Causeway twice as well, and both times to Legoland. The first was during the June holidays, and then the next was during the September holidays. The second time was when we went to Kluang to visit 大外婆, and we dropped by Legoland on the way back. Once again, I don't think you'll recall much of what happened during the trip, other than that the ride you sat most on was on the stroller, with papa pushing you behind.
At Legoland Hotel with your kor kors
How you were, most of the time, on your ride
Entering Legoland a second time round
Sitting on a different ride this time
Here are a few of my favourite shots of you over the year!
Still so tiny at one month old!
You are a smiley baby, thankfully! And particularly chatty too
Super-girl shot
Bouncing to kor kor Nathan playing the piano
Bouncing to your noisy bus toy
Just love that cheeky smile of yours!
And you can sure do a pout~
One thing that you, Nathan and mummy have in common - sleeping in this curled up prone position. Definitely something genetic going on there.
Here are a few family photos, and photos you have with your older brothers! May you always grow in love for each other, and remember that blood is always thicker than water.
First night at your new home, Ola!
Out on a trip as a family to the Istana
Photo with your kor kors
Celebrating kor kor Daniel's 3rd birthday!
Celebrating kor kor Nathan's 6th birthday!
Meanwhile, it's been a wonderful year having you in our family, and bringing so much laughter and joy to each and everyone of us in your own special little way! May you continue to be that smiley/pouty baby and most importantly, remain healthy. It'll be a busy year ahead, and you'll be starting school in no time. Remember that papa and mummy will always love you lots, and will be there for you always.
